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GD's Most Dominating Albums Of The 1980's (100-91)

02/09/08 || Global Domination

100. Kat: 666
^{Released: 1986}

“Metal! Truth is metal! And hell!”

Does the above phrase make sense to you? I guess not, but I guarantee that after a single listen to this album you won’t be able to get it out of your head. From the frantic thrashing of “Metal and hell”, through mid-paced songs like “Devil’s house part I” and the ballad-ish “Time of revenge” all the way to the end of the extremely catchy “666”, this album delivers pure satanic pleasure. And with the word “Satan” repeated no less than 21 times during the course of a single song, this has to be one of the most intensely blasphemous records ever. The guitar work is not as complex as on “Róże miłości…” or “Bastard”, and the rhythm section is downright simplistic, but all of this doesn’t matter when there’s an abundance of catchy thrash riffs topped with the voice of the best Polish metal singer around. It is no coincidence that bands such as Vader, Behemoth and Lux Occulta chipped in to the tribute to this band, with covers of songs from this album. “666” is pure satanic genius, a fact anyone who has ever heard this album is bound to recognize.

-Max Von Laibach (ex-staffer/cocksucker)

99. Mötley Crüe: Shout at the devil
^{Released: 1983}

It’s fucken amazing how one once looked at Mötley Crüe and actually thought they were kinda… ehum… evil… Man, they looked like a fucken bunch of whores, threw the devil horns, used pentagrams and pretended to be in league with my father, Satan. Of course we bought it, we were like fucken 2 years old when this shit happened. We later learned that the only thing that was true about Mötley was the fact that they looked like whores. But no matter what, “Shout at the devil” is quite possibly one of the finest hard rock albums ever. “Red hot”, “Looks that kill”, “Too young to fall in love” and the title track – all classic tunes on a classic album. After this, Mötley pretty much turned to shit, but hey – before doing that they definitely gave us some fantastic music with “Shout at the devil”. I really believe this here album should be higher on the list coz it sure beats the fuck out of shit bands like Tesla, who, as if by magic, follows…

-Lord K Philipson

98. Tesla: The great radio controversy
^{Released: 1989}

How this album got on a GD Best-of list is beyond me. I think I was the only one who voted for it. Anyway, Tesla is mostly known for two things: the quintessential ballad “Love Song” (which is on here) and as the band who pioneered the unplugged concert that was a 1990’s MTV staple. When this disc came out in 1989, most American rock bands were putting out glam rock drivel. Tesla’s product was a bluesy, gritty take on the sound Def Leppard brought to American shores only a few years before. They join the ranks of Cinderella and Queensryche (“Empire”) as bands that are unfairly lumped in with the Poisons and Wingers of the hair metal world.

-Hanging Limbs

97. Flotsam and Jetsam: Doomsday for the deceiver
^{Released: 1986}

Flotsam and Jetsam will be remembered for being Jason Newsted’s first band, but they should be remembered for being a badass thrash/power metal band. In a way it’s fortunate that the Newsted connection exists, because without it we might not remember “Doomsday for the Deceiver” at all. Look at the year this album was released—it didn’t stand a chance in hell of being absorbed in the greater heavy metal consciousness. The competition from established bands was too great, the number of classic albums to abundant. It’s a damn shame, because the material is fucking killer. Their brand of thrash is just as blistering as the Metallicas and Kreators of the world, but Flotsam retained a more traditional vocal style, one in line with the Iron Maidens of the world. The result is… well it’s power metal, but the sort of power metal that’s actually worth listening to. Plus, Flotsam’s prog inspired epic songs put Metallica’s instrumental snooze fests to shame. “Doomsday…” is a killer album, no question about it.

-Stephen

96. SOD: Speak English or die
^{Released: 1985}

At the time of release, “Speak penis or die” was among the hardest and most fierce recordings you could find and bang yer skull to. Jampacked with classics, humor and catchy-ass riffs 24/7, S.O.D managed to piss out an instant classic even with the fat fucken idiot redneck Billy Milano in the band. Or maybe becoz of him. Gotta applaud them for that. Those who won’t admit to the brilliance of a song like “Ballad of Jimi Hendrix”, well, you understand nothing. This is a must-have in your record collection if you consider yourself even close to being a metalhead. By the way, it would have been a hella lot more fun if Sergeant D was called Sergeant C, as in “semen”, though.

-Lord K Philipson

95. Amebix: Arise
^{Released: 1984}

Sure, hardcore can be aggressive, hardcore can be homicidal, and hardcore can definitely be fast as fuck, but Amebix is probably the only hardcore band that sounds EVIL. Like, “Altars of Madness” evil at times. The stuff here is pretty doomy and has large flakes of crust falling off of it, but Amebix can bring the speed up when they have to. The music here evokes images of solitary monuments of blood and wire erected in a barren wasteland, and the lyrics are quite brutal as well, forgoing your average liberal diatribes for tales of paranoia, death, and the Axeman. One of the most essential 80s hardcore albums for sure, and any metalhead who turns his nose up at it ought to be flayed alive.

-Seker

94. Ozzy Osbourne: Blizzard of Ozz
^{Released: 1980}

Ozzy Osbourne: Blizzard of Ozz

After being fired from Sabbath, many counted out the Prince of fucking Darkness, but thanks to succubus Sharon and a Randy Rhoads (a true guitar heroes of yore), they were proved to be severely fucking mistaken. Nowadays, it’s hard to believe that (and it breaks my heart to say it) the shambling fool showed to us on mtv has given us metal monuments such as “Crazy Train”, “Suicide Solution” and “I Don’t Know”. “Blizzard of Ozz” will forever stand tall as a landmark for metal, and I’m fucking amazed that it didn’t score higher on this list, it’s definitely one of THE most prominent metal releases of the 80’s. “Blizzard of Ozz” is probably the first album that got me into metal after listening mostly to old rock n’ roll. I remember hearing the first riff of “I don’t know” and after that my world was changed forever, a experience somewhat akin to discovering masturbation. Nowadays, with the number of real rock stars diminishing fast, we owe it to ourselves to experience the Ozzman from the time when he was at his best: On ridiculous amounts of drugs.

-The Prophet

93. Killing Joke: Killing Joke
^{Released: 1980}

When it comes to bands that people attempt to label, Killing Joke are definitely one of the most entertaining. Just listen to a few of these gems I picked up while making a quick 5 minute net browse: heavy industrial rock, experimental tribal punk, proto-alternative quasi-metal, anarcho post-punk, gothic psycho-metal (and my personal favorite) apocalyptipop. While it’s easy to laugh, it is hard to describe The Joke. Considering their career spans over 20 years and touches many different styles, it’s also hard to pinpoint their peak. Still, their debut album will always remain (arguably) their most influential. It was raw, desolate, dark and pessimistic. But damn it was fun. And fucking catchy. “Requiem”‘s opening synth stab opens the way for a ripping guitar riff, moments before Jaz’s anguished yet focused yell kicks in. “Change” sounds like Gang of Four on steroids (and crack). Individually, not every single track is a killer, but there’s more than enough good fun here for the whole family.

Brian Eno once famously said that while only a few thousand people bought the first Velvet Underground album, almost every single one of them was inspired to start up a band. I have a feeling the same analogy could be applied to Killing Joke’s debut album. While I have no actual figures or empirical evidence to base myself on, there are tons of bands who quoted them as an influence. Many moved on to achieve much more critical and commercial success than The Joke ever initially dreamed of (Metallica, Foo Fighters, The Mane and his Dirty Closet Bears, etc…) The bottom line is that I’m drunk, I am no longer on staff, I don’t give a fuck and Killing Joke fucking rocks. Give their debut a listen, it definitely belongs on this list.

-Fishermane (ex-staffer/cocksucker/super rad special guest/cunt)

92. Nuclear Assault: Game over
^{Released: 1986}

Nuclear Assault used to be another one of those bands that I completely worshiped while being a youngster. John Connelly’s fantastic screams/yells with the insanely groovy thrash metal they composed – you got yourself a fucken match made in fucken metal heaven. “Game over” is a touchdown. A home run. A beautiful goal a’la Peter Forsberg in his prime. “Survive” was ace as well, but “Game over” is the one album from them that should be remembered as their finest offering ever. We all know that the reunion these guys did sucked the balls big time, but forget about that and keep this album in mind since it’s the best reference as for why Nuclear Assault should have been among The Big 4. Yeah, meaning Krokus, Tytan, Cinderella and Scorpions. Hang the fucken pope, bitches! Hang the fucken fag until the rope breaks.

-Lord K Philipson

91. Rush: Moving pictures
^{Released: 1980}

Rush may not be metal, but since they wipe the floor with almost all of the metal bands out there, here they are (Note from Stephen: Plus, Rush gets the grandfather clause when it comes to metal. In the 70’s Rush was the thinking man’s heavy, make no mistake about it). It is very rare for a band this talented and this Canadian to record one of the most memorable song intros of all-time, but who hasn’t heard the synth intro to “Tom Sawyer”? While “Tom Sawyer” was a commercial smash, the true beauty lies when you delve deeper into this record. The progressive opuses that gave them a solid fanbase would soon give way to a simpler, more commercial sound ripe with synths and catchy choruses. “Moving Pictures” lands square in the middle and unites fans from each era.

-Hanging Limbs (ex-staffer/cocksucker)

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